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At St. Gallen I came off with a fine of fifteen florins. When the carpenters had finished, it was the turn of the masons, then came the plasterer, the glazier, the locksmith and the cabinet-maker, one after another. This last in particular I assisted to the utmost of my ability, so that I learnt the craft fairly well, and by the work of my own hands saved myself a tidy schilling or two. But meanwhile my foot took a long time to heal, and for many years I was to limp on it, otherwise everything would have gone forward much more speedily. On the 17th of June, however, I was at last able to move into my new house, together with my brother, who now alone with me tended our little hearth, so that we were, so to speak, man and wife, manservant and maidservant, cook and cellarer all rolled into one. But even so I lacked many things yet. Wherever I looked about me I saw cheerful sunny corners, but for the most part they were empty. Yet again I was obliged to put my hand into my purse, and it was so small and thin, that even now I am astonished at the way the kreutzers, the batzen and the guilders crept out and away, or rather, left my purse for that of another. In the end, however, much was accounted for by a load of debts amounting to nearly a thousand guilders! And did this not cause me anxiety? O sweet, innocent carelessness of my youth!
And with all this I had now been running after this obstinate girl for almost four years, and she with somewhat less eagerness after me. And whenever we were unable to meet, then short or long letters must be exchanged every day; and in this matter my wily Dulcinea succeeded in deceiving me in masterly fashion. For she wrote her letters mostly in verse, so cleverly that she far excelled me. I took great pleasure in this little scholar, and thought to possess in her an eminent poetess. But in the end it came out that she could neither write nor read what was written, but had had everything prepared for her by a neighbour who was in her confidence.
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we were married. Pastor Seelmatter made us a fine sermon and tied us in wedlock. So my freedom ended and strife began on that very first day - and has endured even to this. I was supposed to submit and would not do so, and will not do so now. She should do the same, and is even more unwilling than I.And I should not, moreover, conceal the fact that purely practical motives had brought me to this marriage, and that I never felt towards her that tender inclination that men are wont to call love. But I was well aware of this at the time, and am yet convinced at this present hour, that of all the women that I might have taken, she was far, far the best suited to my circumstances. My reason remains certain that none could be more salutary for me, however much a certain mutinousness in me rebels against this severe taskmistress, and in short, although one side of my better half's nature is even now at times repugnant to me, yet all the more do I secretly but honestly respect her other and better side. And so, if mine cannot be reckoned among the happiest of marriages, yet it should certainly not be reckoned among the unhappiest, but rather among those which are happy in part, and I shall never regret it. [...]
64. Death and life:
The year 1762 was especially important to me by reason of the 26th of March and the 10th of September. On the first of these days my dear father died a sudden and violent death which left me inconsolable for a long time. In the morning he went into the forest to look for wood. Towards evening my sister Anne-Marie came to me with tears in her eyes, and said that father had gone out very early and was not yet come home; they were all afraid that he had met with some harm, so I must go out and look for him. His little dog had several times come home and
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The marriage took place on 3rd November 1761.
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